Saturday, October 24, 2020
Washington- Following a full pardon by The President, an emboldened Joe Arpaio encountered new legal troubles during a scheduled visit to The White House, after attempting to detain The First Lady on suspicion of residing in the country illegally. While...
Washington- Moments after expressing his frustration with Senate Democrats' refusal to "engage in a serious way" in the Senate's recent health care effort, Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnel was blown off The Senate Floor by a massive thunderbolt cast...
Washington- A leaked document from The White House shows President Trump originally drafted five statements on the violence in Charlottesville before finally offering his insincere condolences in a poorly worded tweet. See The President's five initial responses below.    
Washington-- In a recent memo, Attorney General, Jeff Sessions, ordered the immediate implementation of a 'casual Friday' policy for all employees of The Department of Justice. "It's been a fun change of pace. I'll tell you that." Said Attorney...
Heaven- After national leaders made multiple nuclear threats on social media, The President of The United States referred to white supremacists as "fine people", and a neo-nazi plowed a car into a crowd of anti-hate protesters all in the same...
New York— After months of failed attempts, Fox Anchor, Tucker Carlson successfully held a fart through the 8 o’clock time slot Friday. “It wasn’t easy.” Said Fox Producer, Phil Stockwell. “You could really see the strain in his face....
Kensington, CA- After ascending a teetering pile of cookbooks perched on a top kitchen shelf, local cat Derek's plans to bathe in the highest, least-stable location in his entire house were cut short when a sudden movement sent the cookbooks...
Keene, NH-  With the 2017 television season rapidly approaching, local graphic designer, Pete Holden, has begun preparations to achieve a lifelong goal: complete a TV marathon. For the past six weeks, Holden has rigorously trained his mind, body, and spirit...